Doing it Right: The Life of a Hockey Wife ERICA LUNDMARK

Sacrifice comes from within. You must make the decision yourself in sacrifice. You can be forced to make a choice, but only you can take ownership of that choice. What we do as “hockey wives” comes from within.

A little girl ponders a vision. One that draws upon the ideals of success mixed with the aroma of possible… no definite. It’s not a fairy princess tale where she lives in a castle and has all the luxuries of its name. In this vision the screaming sky scrapers of the big city call her. The hustle beats to the very rhythm of her heart. She dreamed that one day she would the big boss lady nestled into a shoebox apartment in New York. A ten year olds dreams are more real and possible than you could ever imagine. She knew what she wanted.  But after all, do you know what? She did get that fairy tale. This is the story of Erica Lundmark. This month’s feature hockey wife is the kind, go-getting, badass momma mogul type. You’re gonna love her.

The Lundmarks have journeyed a great journey. Through all the typical ups and downs of life… the Lundmarks have handled those in conjunction with moving, moving, and more moving. They have left their mark in the mainstream professional hockey. Seven levels to be exact. WHL (major junior), AHL, NHL, KHL, SEL, Italy-A-, and most presently, the Austrian league. But their story starts where that little girls vision proved true.

Erica, originally from a small town near Philadelphia,  lived in that shoebox of an apartment in New York, as promised. Erica received her degree from the University of St. Johns in Queens, NY and from there quickly accepted a position at Eli Lilly Pharmaceuticals. But it was during those university days that she met her forever man. Grinding it out at Del Frisco’s Steak House to put herself through school, she meets Jamie Lundmark. In courtly fashion, the young couple are engaged . And la-dee-dah they lived happily ever after…

Here’s the thing. You can’t marry a hockey player without having a serious conversation about what it means to marry a hockey player, or any professional athlete for that matter. “I will never ever forget a moment after that {New York} Rangers game”, Erica recalls, “I came into the {team} family room and everyone was crying.” Shortly, Erica had learned that many players had been traded. Seeing how it was just before the lockout, tactical moves were implemented to get rid of salaries. It just business. “I sat there and watched how everyone’s lives were completely uprooted with very little notice as the players traded leave that very night.” she shares.

Was this in Erica’s vision? Had she dreamt of this as a little girl? It was an eye-opening experience for Erica. She wondered what she had gotten herself into. She was in love. She was conflicted. “Living in Manhattan was my dream coming true. Jamie’s dreams of playing hockey didn’t quite fit in with my dreams…I actually gave him back my engagement ring because I was so freaked out by the reality of this sports world.” She needed to make a conscious decision and within a short time span, Jamie and Erica approached her fear with open and honest dialogue. “He said to me, ‘Erica, I’ve worked my entire life for this and this is just how it is. I cannot promise you that we can stay in New York forever, in fact, I can pretty much guarantee that is not going to be an option for us.'” Their conversation continues down the path of vulnerability in that he was asking her to love him for who is was and if she couldn’t accommodate a {hockey wife} life of uncertainty than that would be her choice. Erica’s love was not the question. And in that moment she realized this, “I realized that he was right. I loved him for him and what he did for a living was something that I would have to adjust my own goals for and make it work…because I loved him. He deserved someone that would support him 100%.”

In July 2005, Erica and Jamie were married in Cancun during Hurricane Emily. Her vision of a tranquil white sand beach wedding was skewed. Later in October, The newlyweds purchase their first home in New York…in that same month, Jamie was traded from the New York Rangers to Arizona Coyotes. “I moved into our first home alone, and then immediately packed up and shipped half of our belongings to Phoenix. I fought back the tears as I told my boss that I had to quit and move to Phoenix.  Once settled in Arizona and expecting their first child, Jamie was traded at 3:00pm on the trade deadline. At 5 months pregnant, Erica packs up their world and heads north to Flames territory. Erica states, “It was a really good thing we had that conversation back when we were just engaged…at least I knew I was truly committed to all of this because it was worse than I expected it to be.” It is rare to be traded twice in one season so the state of affairs was truly unappeasing. Along with the stress of moving and being divided by a trade there are additional stresses that come along with it as well. If a trade is unwanted there are emotions to deal with from your other half. I can imagine feelings of doubt, self-confidence, belonging…dealing with a hockey husband can be a job in itself, let alone taking care of yourself and the move. This is their livelihood. It defines who they are. There are not many jobs out in the world that people begin to prepare for in their toddler years. I’m serious. Passion can strike you early.

The next 5 years were filled with more children and more trades. Three ridiculously gorgeous blond babies later, Erica was thrilled to finally start a career again. Of course she planned ahead. Erica is the type of woman who gets things done. Her business mentality keeps her behind the 8-ball at all times. I asked her how she does it all and she divulges that it’s because of her “crazy world…I don’t have time to procrastinate. I have to just get $h!# done. Truly. If I let one thing go by the wayside…everything falls apart.” With constant relocation experience and her strong background in sales, real estate was lock and key for her. You want to talk about getting things done? Erica was studying for her real estate exam while in the delivery room for the birth of her daughter. 

The Lundmark Group Real Estate Team.

Erica started The Lundmark Group Real Estate team
in 2010. They sell millions of dollars of real estate per year in
the Philadelphia market. She is the bench boss to 6 other agents on
her team. Her team is also like her family. “I would be lost without
them.” Her vision has been tweaked over the years but has come to the
realization that perhaps things happen for a reason. “What has been so wonderful
for me is being able to help other athlete families. Athlete families have
unique needs for housing and I truly understand all of that,” she
explains. Being a resource for families across all avenues of professional
sport requires special detail. She reminds athletes of those details such as
finances, she always suggests spending less in light of impermeability. She
focusses on properties that can be rented out during the off season if a
player’s “home” is different from their hockey season home, or perhaps if they are traded on the fly. She doesn’t shy away from a good old fashioned reality check because she know how possible it really is. 

Erica uses social media to help families in the Philadelphia area. Grab that olive branch and make a martini!

Erica
reasons, “I try to be the person that I wish I had when I was
being moved around all the time. I often feel like maybe we went through so
much with Jamie’s career so that I could learn so much more about how to help
others.” Selling a home to Erica is her equivalent to wining the Stanley Cup. She
treats each sale as if it were her last and she puts everything she has into
it. Keep in mind she is doing this all solo with three kids and two golden
retrievers while Jamie is overseas battling it out in Austria, no doubt missing his family like crazy. The two make it work for each
other. Jamie understands how important it is for Erica to have her own career and identity and to be successful and accomplished in her own right. She is devoted
whole-heartedly to every task she commits to. Erica even helped former feature Hockey Wife, Kodette LaBarbera start ‘Love for Lokomotive’, a fundraising initiative to help the families of the fallen hockey team that died tragically in a plane crash. Erica took on the task of handling all of the bracelet sales overseas.  

All work no play? I’d want her as my realtor. FOUR!

The Lundmark clan makes life work like a well oiled
machine. Regardless if she feels overwhelmed or like a hot mess, this
momma/wifey is killing it. Her two boys, Austin and Karter are obsessed
with hockey so aside from the daily routine of everyday life, throw in 5am
weekend practices and tournaments and you’ve almost got a three-ring circus.
Her youngest, Chloe, has started to beg Erica to play hockey. They try to
encourage the kids to dabble in many activities, not just hockey. Austin has
even dabbled in some modelling. This family is gorgeous from the inside out, I
don’t blame people for being so drawn to this squad. 

I asked Erica what it is like for her as a
“single-parent” during the hockey season and she comments that,
“Parenting while Jamie is away is obviously very tough. I don’t have
nannies or anything to help. I run my business, the house and the kids on
my own. My family and friends help when they can…they understand my
situation.” Fist bump.  

Off to see dad!

“My
girlfriends have been in the delivery room with me while giving birth, my
best friend has offered to go to hockey tournaments with me so I’m
not alone.” 

Erica and Jamie always stayed together through his
trades regardless if he played in the NHL or AHL, but it wasn’t until he
started playing overseas and the kids were in school that they decided it would
be best for the kids to stay in one place. Jamie has been with KAC in Austria
for the past 5 years. This is the longest stint with one team in his career.
“It scares me to say that out loud because our past was difficult. I don’t
remember one specific thing that was the hardest about trades but I can truly
say that Jamie’s years in the NHL were absolutely some of the hardest years of
our lives.” All too many know this feeling as the NHL is the pinnacle of
that childhood dream. That dream and passion that began at an age that almost
seem inconceivable. 

Near or far, she’s in your corner.

There aren’t many that I know that will fight harder to support the man she loves (except maybe me). She
feels his passion for the game like it is her own. “We have built
this family and our careers together. Jamie makes me a better person.” Erica
gloats lovingly. Her fairy tale continues to unfold. Last year on the 10 year anniversary of their hurricane nuptuals, Jamie surprised his hard working and supportive wife with her dream white sand beach wedding sans storm. The two renewed their vows with their children as their witnesses. I know, swoon, right? 

Wedding #2….sigh…

This family is making it work. This wife is doing it right! It may not be the way you do things in your home or in your marriage but you know what…she’s teaching me a few things along the way. Valuable things, like prioritizing what is important, taking a stand for yourself and your dreams,  willingly taking risks for the sake your husband’s happiness, and damn well knowing that it’s going to be tough but that you are badass enough to handle it. 

It really makes me happy to do what I do here on this blog. It’s true, I speak to a specific demographic and I suppose that is what ‘branding’ is all about, but it gives me purpose and it gives me all the feels to show the world {aka my small following}, that women ~ who happen to be married to hockey players or professional athletes ~ are killing it out there and the stereotypes that infest your perspective with negativity and taint your well being are nobody’s problems but your own. What is amazing about Erica Lundmark is that I don’t anticipate she would ever take a grain of anyone’s negativity. She understands that life is what it is and she won’t let anyone hold her back from being the game maker in her Hunger Games. You could easily get eaten alive in this game, but handling it like a boss is what gets you by. 

I mean….

Erica, thank you for showing me a whole new world of strength and drive. Also…your family isn’t very hard on the eyes either…Sweet dreams all.